Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
