hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Buhtt sex?
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
