Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize