yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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