i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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