I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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