I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
