it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
