Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
