If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
party gras won. party gras always wins.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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