If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
