do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
