Taylor Swift is so right about you.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Randomize
