pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
My pussy is not your playground.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
