why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
false alarm, still single
He literally asked permission to hit on me
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
