It's just like the Real World with babies
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Randomize