too bad you live with your parents still
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
