Define "chronic" masturbator.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize