im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
