i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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