Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
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