their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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