; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
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