He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
