carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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