I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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