I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I want to fling myself into the sun
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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