Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
i think im in europe. pls send help
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
