Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
