if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
