Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
