Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
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