so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
