is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
