Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize