break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
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