what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Randomize
