Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
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