i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
