Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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