is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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