yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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