sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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