I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
