you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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