I CAN MOONWALK!
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
