Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I just blew my weed a kiss
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
