how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize