thus making me awesome and them whores
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
