So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Drunk is a universal language darling
Randomize
